Written by Keith Koehler, FOSNOD Founder
FOSNOD was founded to change the world by Focusing On Similarities, Not On Differences. We are all tired of the divisiveness and want truth? Those who stand to gain from driving wedges between people want us to focus on differences. We are all members of humanity sharing one earth. We possess many more similarities than differences. By focusing on our similarities and not our differences, we can change the world.Over the last 20 years or so things have changed – and change is typically good, but not always. America used to be “the great melting pot,” where immigrants were welcomed and accepted. Obviously, there were ugly instances in our history where people treated others horrifically and it was important that we affected change and corrected those egregious behaviors. And although society will never be perfect, it seemed like at the turn of century we were moving in the right direction. America was making strides in equality and fairness. As a country over the last two decades, we have become more and more divided almost to the point of no return. And I think a lot of it’s pushed by different organizations, politics, the media, even some religious organizations. It’s like the idea of everyone getting along – that just doesn’t make for a good enough story anymore. Strife drives the news.
So I began thinking… well, how do we change that? How do we get back to the idea that we can live in harmony and flourish as a society?
For me, it comes down to how children interact with each other. If you take a bunch of five-year-olds, and you put them outside together, it doesn’t matter their race, their gender, their nationality, their religion, or even what language they speak… they just want to play. That’s what they inherently all have in common. And that commonality overrides whatever differences they have between them. But from that point in their lives forward, it seems like we start teaching them to notice those differences and focus on them. We begin to place a premium on the idea of identifying the things in others that differ from our beliefs, our level of income, our way of interacting, etc.
As an example, I was brought up in a home with an aversion toward the idea of homosexuality. So that’s just the way my moral compass guided me for years. That belief system was put to the test when I found that one of my daughters was gay. Looking back, I’m sad to say I caused her a lot of mental anguish because she was very distraught, knowing how I felt at the time. When my wife and I were presented with the fact that our daughter was in love with a woman, it was a big adjustment. I started thinking, okay, well, I don’t understand this. This doesn’t align with the beliefs I’ve had my entire life. I know I love my daughter, but how am I supposed to respond to this?
I began to realize I was focusing on the wrong part of this whole thing. I was so worried about the differences between my daughter and I that I had lost sight of what we still had in common. I love her. She’s my daughter, my kid. The history we shared hadn’t changed. We were still the same two people and our relationship was the same. She’s still this same wonderful person, and now she and I were able to focus on the wonderful relationship we shared without letting our differences divide us. We were both able to learn and be better for it.
And from that moment on, I realized that virtually everything you can identify as a difference from a distance is irrelevant. You see somebody across the room who seems to embody some particular stereotype we’ve been conditioned to identify and you begin building those mental walls and you miss out on the chance to really get to know them. If instead you took the time to meet them and listen for the things you have in common, you would likely realize so many ways that you actually identify WITH this person.
So, I thought, well, I need to come up with a word or phrase that captures this concept. Something that was unique, that a group could even build an organization around. One that would focus on similarities; not on differences as we’ve been taught our whole lives. So FOSNOD was born. I established the organization, bought the domain, and I was ready to take the concept to the world…
Then COVID hit. And boy, did I wish FOSNOD had already been around by then!
Aside from becoming one of the deadliest pandemics to come along in decades, COVID also became a lightning rod for division and the entire era sort of represented a time when – instead of coming together to solve this universal problem we all shared – everyone focused so intensely on how individuals responded differently to the virus. Do you wear a mask? Do you not? Are you, or are you not, vaccinated? It was pushed on all of us and used by this party or that organization to galvanize us into “taking a side.” And suddenly we were all divided over things we hadn’t even experienced before! Even families and friends became divided. A time when we had more universal similarities than we had ever shared suddenly became a time of more division than I had witnessed in decades.
And so, with this concept of FOSNOD, what I’m hoping is – at risk of sounding a bit corny – I’m hoping it can change the world now before it’s too late.
We want FOSNOD to become more than a way of thinking – even more than a brand or concept We want FOSNOD to become a globally recognized achievement. Our hope is that politicians and global corporations and organizations will be proud to incorporate and advertise a FOSNOD culture. We hope parents teach their children FOSNOD.
FOSNOD recognizes diversity of talents, personalities, and cultures but it’s our similarities and shared humanity that drive our success in research and in the health and welfare of all.
To get the FOSNOD message out takes time and – yes – money so we have set up a donation section on the website. People will be able to donate any amount they choose. FOSNOD gear bearing the FOSNOD logo is available with donations. If someone can’t afford to donate, but wants to help spread the word, we will find a way to get them FOSNOD gear. Initial donations will go toward advertising and brand awareness. Once we have raised enough funds, we will put donations toward programs that motivate and reward individuals, corporations, and organizations who promote and exemplify the FOSNOD message through actions.
In the meantime, the FOSNOD website will primarily be a place where people share their stories and experiences that shine as examples of “Focusing On Similarities, Not On Differences.” So this is your invitation – please share with us your stories. Join the FOSNOD movement and help us spread the word!